Authenticity allowed — for Service Professionals
/I really do believe we attract what we focus on, and what we believe — in fear or in love. I believe — and perhaps that belief is why I attract the experience — that this applies to the people and relationships we attract as well, clients included.
When we shift our mindsets to focus on what we love or what brings us joy, and we begin to recognize that, we inherently believe that, and not the thing we feared. The momentum of that takes a little time to show up, so it may seem as if we’re still attracting the previous focus, when in fact the shift simply hasn't yet shown up in our physical reality yet. Exciting, isn't it? That means we just need to stay focused on what we want, rather than fear, to see more of what we want. In my experience, it is quite literal, and it happens more readily now, than when I first started focusing more mindfully.
Contradiction or paradox?
Posted one after the other on LinkedIn, I found two (2) beliefs around attracting clients that are quite potent among service entrepreneurs:
Be yourself — that will attract clients who appreciate the real you (post from Melissa-Jane Nguyen).
Be like them — that will attract clients more easily (post from Daniel Abrahams).
Life is constantly showing me that there is far more paradox than contradiction, if we go deep enough. These two (2) seemingly contradictory views tell that story too. Why? Well, if being yourself attracts clients then they showed up because who you are, genuinely, attracted them. Plus, if being like them means framing exactly who you are through their lens, then the same is true — just with a bit more effort. If you read Daniel Abrahams’ post, the blind man didn’t say that he wasn't blind — he was still very much himself — he just framed it using the pedestrians’ experience.
Yourself or a “you” that “they” understand?
My reason for not purporting the second point is that the busy people I meet will not see the room to be freely themselves in the second philosophy. It’s there, but our training may not allow us to see it. That’s why there are those in our world doing whatever it takes to be “normal”, missing the value of “unique”.
Self-acceptance brings greater confidence, mental space for better decision-making and greater well-being across the board, because your body is not under duress. This benefits the world, at large, because when you create and deliver service from an authentic place, those receiving it benefit on a far deeper level than if it comes from a mask.
The mask creates baggage, where authentic service creates flow. Even the effort to “think like them” can split your focus and attract clients you have to keep that level of effort with, to even communicate well — taking energy away from what you're delivering. They're not getting your best.
Much of what is out there tells us we have to be something other than who we are. Better, smarter, more polite, less polite, leaner, more voluptuous, less serious, more serious — anything you think of, someone is marketing a way to fix, change or improve upon.
I support clients in focusing intrinsically — introvert or not. Creating a framework — pricing, process, feasible schedule — that you can breathe within makes space for you to be truly present and actually listen, when you're with clients. You already have aligned — not necessarily the same — values and approaches to the service you offer, so more energy goes into solutions than into learning to communicate.
Then, articulating your message to clients — or if you hire SEO copywriters and content creators — is easier, because you're sharing yourself authentically and that is attracting clients, rather than changing something — anything else — about you to attract someone less compatible.
You choose. Honour your individual sovereignty
My obvious invitation is to choose number one, be yourself to attract like-minded clients, and number 2 is covered. As a proponent of individual sovereignty, however, I absolutely believe you will always land on what you need, in your own time. Several personality types may benefit from each:
Number 2 — many extroverts and those of us prone to self-sabotage or reclusive tendencies, absolutely need the stimulus of external insights. Those of us conscious of ourselves and our needs, who have the time and energy to invest, and want the stimulation of a wholly different perspective in clients, will enjoy the second philosophy more as well.
Number 1 — busy professionals as well as those already too conscious of everyone else and not conscious enough of ourselves and our own needs — folks I meet most often — including social introverts, empaths, perfectionists. Perspectives outside of ourselves and the fun that comes from those conversations happen, for these folks, more socially, where time and energy are less limited.
Not group think
The philosophy of being yourself to attract clients you can serve best, number 1, is not about group think — only meeting folks who think exactly like you. That's an easy way to lose your spark and creative energy. There are likely not many who truly think exactly like you.
It is about connecting with those who share your values and approach to your services so that your energy and focus is on what serves them. This way there is enough diversity of thought to spark creativity, just without the time and financial cost — to the client and to yourself — in figuring out how to communicate or work within a different value set.
Finally, the point of conserving energy and time in business, beyond well-being, is to have time and resources to live life fully. What would you do with more time and energy?
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About Crystal-Marie
Crystal-Marie Sealy, MBA, is a dedicated mom, keynote speaker, two-time best-selling author and strategy consultant. As author and speaker, Crystal-Marie is focused on resilience through authenticity, self-acceptance and individual sovereignty. Her business talks are around mindful entrepreneurship through pricing, lean process, and feasible schedules for inspired creativity and focused productivity. She also delivers corporate training around client-centric social media strategy. As a strategy consultant, and president and founder of Crystal-Marie Sealy—previously Successiory (2011-2019)—Crystal-Marie's signature "Mindful Entrepreneurship for Mindful Affluence™" empowers premium service professionals to create businesses they can truly thrive in. Good-bye rate race. Hello blue ocean. Earn more. Work less. Live well. Connect with Crystal-Marie at www.CrystalMarieSealy.com
