The 2020 Shift in Women and Work for Me

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Upasana 'Uppi’ Doshi, one of the most passionate people I met while reading for my MBA at the Schulich School of Business, York University, wrote this LinkedIn article, after seeing headlines about women leaving the workforce (2020). If you're feeling this deeply as well, I believe you will find solace and a sense of support in her article. I truly empathize with this lens on the shift, and many of us will feel and experience it as she has. Thank you so much for sharing so vulnerably, Uppi. I know many Moms feel the same but will not speak up and release it as you have. May your message make them feel seen and heard. ❤️

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My experience of 2020, however, has been deeply awakening and positive, for me, despite some of my own personal horrors-turned-wonders, including becoming a single Mom fortunate enough to stay at home and still work on occasion.

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2020 made me realize that creating a new model of "working mother"—shifting my perspective—was exactly what I wanted, but would not have fully given myself permission to have. An MBA is supposed to <<fill in the blanks>> right? I even had a lawyer turned stay-at-home mom lay into me at a playgroup, once, when she realized I had an MBA and was a speaker. I just let her talk. Who knows what prison she is in. Motherhood can be a very lonely journey, surprisingly, because few want to hear that you’re doing it differently. Support really comes from those who embrace that none of us will do it the same, and in holding space rather than “correcting” or “advising”.

Opportunity—New Possibilities

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I know it seems like a bad thing, women leaving in droves, and for all the reasons listed in the headlines and in Uppi's article. Still, for many I know, it has been a relief, to simply live differently and, more importantly, "create their own workplaces instead of returning to the moulds of the existing workplace". Introverts, differently-abled people, those caring for differently-abled or unwell loved ones at home, and parents, are just a few.

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The opportunity palpable in this shift, once we stop panicking, is that we can create an entirely different “workforce”. One that is genuinely inclusive—of race, gender, different abilities, yes, but also of different cycles, schedules and ways of working. At a conference I'd attended years ago, Seth Godin said, ‘if they wouldn’t let you on their stages, build your own’—not bring your own chair or table, but build your own stage. That has stayed with me, always. What if we used this opportunity to create that different creative environment? One that allowed us to be, without conforming?

  • Businesses seemingly on the brink can very well be brought back by a pool of paid (grants, sponsors, crowdfunding) women advisors, forced to leave the conventional workforce, who may be able to work less, but still generate amazing outcomes. (Not excluding other genders. Women are mentioned here, due to the nature of this blog post, but this fits anyone put out of the job market for reasons womennhave faced predominantly in 2020).

  • Collaboration is not just a buzzword—whether it’s a think tank dedicated to creating new truly inclusive ways to work, or a gap in the world that brings together sponsors and unconventional project teams that leverage the female talent leaving in droves—collaboration literally makes the seemingly impossible, happen.

  • Shifting careers to train in what you did prior to having to leave your career. I've focused.more on keynotes and writing, as it gives me more time with my daughter. What can the team you left, or a team you haven't yet considered, benefit from learning from you?

Radically Different

I, for example, never thought that three (3) years in, I would still be doing keynotes, writing and consulting part-time, while being stay-at-home mom full-time, yet, I'm finding deep fulfillment here.

2020 sealed the deal for me, and free-thinkers like Ayelet Baron, author of the three volumes of “F*ck the Bucket List” (ordered, hope to read soon) among others, further grounded that concept as my new normal, so to speak. Not because they have the same lifestyle / business models, but because of the sense of community they have unwittingly provided for me in forging forward with their own unique models of being.

More, I may never have made peace with my new model of being if it wasn't for 2020. An empath and introvert who thrives within feminine energy, operating for much of my life as an extrovert in predominantly masculine energy, there are no words to adequately explain the value of the time and space away from the world, that 2020 provided for me, in its cocoon. It was almost as if I could feel the hustle and bustle on busy city streets slow down, Matrix movie style, even without leaving my home. It was in the air!

My lens may not be radical to some, but to others, well… Lol. If you're feeling like you've always wanted to, perhaps,

  • be one of those wandering beach-laptop professionals, or

  • a business that operates as a night owl,

  • serve clients around your menstrual cycle or around your Mom’s medical appointments,

what better time to brave it.

I have other friends doing radical things that made even more real to me how much we take for granted the lives we have, in this time and space. One woman just made me realize that I still have si many prisons, still, simply by the choice she made to relocate to do a most amazing business! It was liberating, speaking to her!

My, Always, Invitation

Always, always, I invite you to embrace what resonates and release the rest for your peace of mind. This really is your life, so absolutely honour your individual sovereignty.

Live life now, the way you want. I had very real health scares that made me comfortable—yes, comfort zone comfortable (please read more on the importance of comfort, here)—leaving the conventional world of work behind. Mine and those around me. Perhaps it does take a face-to-face with mortality to realize the barriers we imprison ourselves within, and then break free, in this lifetime. Perhaps it doesn't.

Either way, if you don't honour your individual sovereignty, if you're operating on others schedules for your life or, worse, promises or commitments you have outgrown but are being held accountable to, it is not sustainable. You may not make this shift, permanently and with peace of mind, until you are innately ready. And, it is difficult to hear yourself with too many external voices coming in—that could be books, people, media or even inherited beliefs versus your own innate beliefs—so do take some time away from it all, if you can, to hear yourself.

If you're fortunate enough, however, to wake up to the gift you have that is life, in this very Age, without being rattled to wake up, then I hope you remember that in more moments each day.

What has 2020 done for you? If you're finding hurt in those headlines, I hope you find solace here, or in Upasana's LinkedIn article.

In love, light and shadow, embracing all aspects of ourselves.

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About Crystal-Marie

Crystal-Marie Sealy, MBA, is a dedicated mom, keynote speaker, two-time best-selling author and strategy consultant. As author and speaker, Crystal-Marie is focused on resilience through authenticity, self-acceptance and individual sovereignty. Her business talks are around mindful entrepreneurship through pricing, lean process, and feasible schedules for inspired creativity and focused productivity. As a strategy consultant, and president and founder of Crystal-Marie Sealy—previously Successiory (2011-2019)—Crystal-Marie's signature "Mindful Entrepreneurship for Mindful Affluence™" empowers premium service professionals to create businesses they can truly thrive in. Good-bye rat race. Hello blue ocean. Earn more. Work less. Live abundantly. Connect with Crystal-Marie at www.CrystalMarieSealy.com